The girl looked up at her mother and said, “We’re regular.”
Her mother looked down and asked, “Regular? What do you mean by that?”
“Well,” the girl said, “Father and Bubba [grandfather] are not regular; we are.”
The 3-year-old girl was speaking about the color of her and her parents’ skin. Her mother is white, her father is a person of color, and she had already come to the conclusion that there are “regular” people and “non-regular” people, white people and people of color. She put her own father and grandfather into the “non-regular” category.
This was one of several stories people brought forward about racism and white privilege that they had seen in their lives at the Racial Justice Allies of Sonoma County (RJASC) on Sept. 23. RJASC meets monthly to “create a safe space for white people to explore and take responsibility for racism and white privilege.” Twenty-two people showed up, to share their experiences and discuss racism in their own lives.
“I get to be a stay-at-home mom and do mommy/baby yoga,” a new mother from Sebastopol said. She explained how her being able to stay home with her child was a manifestation of white privilege, where often for people of color, both parents must work.
Another member was at a fundraiser in San Francisco and noticed there were only a few people of color, “It was a very clear indication of where the wealth is,” she said.
Another member is getting ready to go to college and she cited that her parents can help her out if she can’t afford college on her own through a job, loans and financial aid.
Following the opening, the facilitator of the meeting, Christopher Bowers from Sonoma State University, showed a 10-minute segment from the movie “Mirrors of Privilege: Making Whiteness Visible” by Shakti Butler. The group then discussed ideas the movie brought up and topics people wanted to address.
Members looked into social constructs in their own lives that exhibit unconscious racism. One woman described how listening to her friend mention “black men in the hallway” made her realize that her friend was talking about the men in a negative light. Other people brought up similar stories and the group discussed them in order to confront them.
Several people talked about the difficulty and disappointments around not challenging racism when they see it as well as the importance of doing so.
“I like what one person said about us being models to others when we challenge or choose not to engage in racist behavior,” Bowers said. Whether someone stands up against racism, or does not, he or she is being a model for others on how to interact with racism.
RJASC has a rotating facilitator at each meeting “to respect the diverse styles of the members and ensure that it isn’t always just the white guy leading,” Bowers said. Sometimes the meetings break up into twos or threes and have small group talk, sometimes there are interactive activities, and sometimes they combine the two.
“I don’t think we’ve ever had the problem of people not wanting to talk,” Bowers said.
While racism can be seen as a political issue, Bowers is quick to point out the issue is not just for activists and politically minded people.
“White people have a very special and important role in ending racism,” he said. White people are often raised believing their view of the world is “regular” or even superior. While it isn’t necessarily their fault to see themselves as the norm, it does harm to people who don’t have the same privileges. “This is not about feeling guilty or being a good or bad white person. It’s about working to confront racism in our own lives,” Bowers said.
Lilly Clements came to RJASC from Sonoma State University where she is majoring in Psychology and Women and Gender Studies. Clements said she feels like she is on an island at SSU and wanted to get out into the Sonoma County community. In her lecture class she hears about racial issues once a semester and at the RJASC she gets to discuss it monthly: “It’s nice to hear not just from teenage girls.”
The meetings take place at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation, Santa Rosa (UUCSR) and are populated with everyone from teenagers to senior citizens. UUCSR doesn’t preach or ask for money at the RJASC meetings, which Clements called a “positive open space to talk about race.”
RJASC was formed in February of 2010 in part by Carl Patrick as a monthly meeting. The first step was to create a space to have dialogue and the discussion of racism, Patrick said. After seven meetings there is a core group of about 15-20 people. Each meeting usually has between 25-35 people and about 80-90 people have come through at least once, Patrick estimated. Bowers believes there will be 50-100 people at meetings in a year.
Dialogue and knowledge without action is just intellectualism and doesn’t lead anywhere, Patrick said. He mentioned the July 29 march against Arizona’s SB1070 law in Petaluma. It was the largest march in the Bay Area, which he attributed to having a base of support that included RJASC and the UUCSR.
Patrick said RJASC would help to bring people together so they can work together. He pointed out that the Progressive Festival in Petaluma is traditionally attended by mainly white people, but that there would be more people there if there was a multi-racial base of support.